I haven't even begun to think about Christmas shopping- I'm more preoccupied with finding the perfect gift for my best friend, whose birthday is tomorrow (and mine is a week after that!).
I have been thinking about other things though. Namely, life, the universe, and everything. I've been watching "What the Bleep Do We Know" a lot and last night I just watched "I Heart Huckabees" and I've been reading A Brief History of Time (Steven Hawking) and dealing with the questions that come up from those things.
The frustrating thing is, when my body chemistry in right (ie when I'm in a good mood) I can take all that uncertainty and ineffability and possible lack of choice and control over my life and I can be so optimistic about it, so positive about, that it makes life seem simply fucking grand.
But then when my body chemistry gets fucked up in a bad way and starts to slide downwards all of a sudden it's all death and doom and nothingness and I'm fucking depressed.
It scares me how much hormones in my body affect who I am, and I don't really like it. I can't really find anything to do about it, either, though.  ¶ 7:46 AM